Mental Health at Princeton University
"I'm not depressed, I just need to work harder" – Don't ignore it, talk about it!
My friend’s brother passed away suddenly in a car accident. It really upset me and it made me anxious because I wasn’t sure how to best be there for my friend. Ultimately I realized that there’s no “right thing” to say or do—it’s enough to just be present and let them know you’re there when they need you.
Living through this pandemic has taught me a lot about grief. When I hear the words “loss” and “grieving,” I typically think of the anguish that follows the death of a loved one. While I have experienced this particular kind of pain in the past, I am extremely grateful that I have not encountered it recently; I am thankful that COVID did not take anyone from me.
So then, I ask myself, why am I so upset? How dare I slump around my apartment languishing, when I am so, so lucky?
We have now been sitting with this pandemic for well over a year. It feels ridiculous at this point to keep using COVID as an “excuse” to justify my difficulty focusing on my research, my undeniable short term memory loss, and my general underlying feeling of malaise. We can excuse these things as a normal grief response in the weeks following the death of a loved one, but what do we do when the grief isn’t the result of an isolated event? When it’s just a moderate daily onslaught buzzing in the background?
The grief I have experienced from the pandemic is a “death by a thousand cuts” kind of grief. Each loss on its own doesn’t seem so bad, just a minor inconvenience. But all together, it is substantial. I am grieving all of the dinner parties and game nights I would have hosted at my apartment. I am grieving the loss of a year and a half worth of birthday celebrations with friends.
I am grieving missed champagne toasts at the end of dissertation defenses. I am grieving the loss of two family vacations that were cancelled. I am grieving for all the photos that would have been taken throughout this time in my life that I will never have to look back on in the years to come. I am grieving the way I used to feel when I would go for a walk or take a trip to the store. I hate knowing that every time I am in a public place, strangers around me see me as a potential threat, a possible vector, someone who must be avoided. It’s only natural, and I certainly don’t blame them—they don’t know I am vaccinated and regularly getting tested—but it hurts to know that even while wearing a mask and keeping my 6-foot distance, just my existence alone is a nuisance to those around me. We see strangers as faceless obstacles, not people. We judge each other and feel self righteous about our own responses to the pandemic. There’s a pervasive ugliness growing in society in how we interact with and view each other.
When the pandemic first started, I made a plan. I would stick to a regular schedule, go for a run in the mornings, cook elaborate meals, keep busy with research, Zoom with friends and family, and check in with loved ones. I would cherish the time I had for introspection and personal growth. The lockdown would be temporary and I would get through it. My plan and self motivation worked for a while. But it’s been so long, and I am so tired.
I am tired of the phrase “the new normal.” What we are experiencing is certainly not normal, and yet I am losing hope that “normal” is even a place we can return to at this point. What if things will never go back to they way they were? What if the “pre-COVID era” will just be another bygone historical period for nostalgic rumination, something to remember and keep on a shelf like photos from undergrad or songs we used to love when we were kids? How long can we keep this up? What will the long-term effects be for our mental health and our ability to empathize with others?
While my general feeling right now is admittedly bleak, I am also proud of myself for pushing through all this time. It helped to actually name the feeling as grief. Knowing that I am grieving and that it is normal to be grieving, I can accept that it is ok sometimes to just get through the day, one day at a time. I don’t have to function as if everything is normal, because it is not. What I (and everyone else) am experiencing right now is a genuine, substantial loss. I am holding onto hope that some day strangers will have faces again.
My dad passed away a few months ago. Unfortunately I wasn’t able to see him in the year and a half before he died, because I didn’t want to risk flying home and spreading COVID to him while he was already ill. The fact that I hadn’t seen him in so long, and during his decline, makes his death feel like it’s not real. I feel that if I had seen him regularly in the last year and a half of his life, my brain would have been better able to process the fact that he was dying, because I would have seen his disease unfold, and his sudden absence now would feel a lot different if I had been used to seeing him regularly over the last couple years.
I don’t know if I can call myself resilient — this is going to be a long process, and it remains to be seen whether I’ll “bounce back” at the end of this. However, a lot of people in my life have definitely helped me more than I can say. Close friends of mine, including one I met at Princeton, attended the funeral with me. My colleagues took all my meetings on my behalf while I was taking care of funeral and other arrangements. Having people show up for me when I’ve needed them — often without even having to ask them — has made me feel supported and held up while dealing with all this.
The Mental Health Month team sends our support to the AAPI comunities at Princeton and beyond and would like to echo the statement below from Asian Americans Advancing Justice-Atlanta & Georgia NAACP. Additionally, here are extra resources we hope can be helpful at this time. A full list can also now be found by following the link on our resources page here.
On March 16, eight people were killed at three different spas in North Georgia including six Asian women. We are heartbroken by these murders, which come at a time when Asian American communities are already grappling with the traumatic violence against Asian Americans nationwide, fueled by the United States’ long history of white supremacy, systemic racism, and gender-based violence.
As we collectively grieve and respond to this tragedy, we must lead with the needs of those most directly impacted at the center: the victims and their families. And during this time of broader crisis and trauma in our Asian American communities, we must be guided by a compass of community care that prioritizes assessing and addressing our communities’ immediate needs, including in-language support for mental health, legal, employment, and immigration services.
We must also stand firm in decrying misogyny, systemic violence, and white supremacy. We must invest in long-term solutions that address the root causes of violence and hate in our communities. We reject increased police presence or carceral solutions as the answers.
For centuries, our communities have been frequently scapegoated for issues perpetuated by sexism, xenophobia, capitalism, and colonialism. Asians were brought to the United States to boost the supply of labor and keep wages low, while being silenced by discriminatory laws and policies. From the Chinese Exclusion Act in 1882, to the incarceration of Japanese Americans during World War II, to the forced migration of refugees from U.S.-led military conflict in Southeast Asia, to post-9/11 surveillance targeting Muslim and South Asian communities, to ICE raids on Southeast Asian communities and Asian-owned businesses, Asian American communities have been under attack by white supremacy.
Working class communities of color are disproportionately suffering from the ongoing COVID-19 pandemic. The Trump administration’s relentless scapegoating of Asians for the pandemic has only exacerbated the impact on Asian business owners and frontline workers and inflamed existing racism. The hypersexualization of Asian American women and the broad normalization of violence against women of color, immigrant women, and poor women make Asian American women particularly vulnerable. Hate incidents against Asian Americans rose by nearly 150% in 2020, with Asian American women twice as likely to be targeted.
We are calling on our allies to stand with us in grief and solidarity against systemic racism and gender-based violence. Violence against Asian American communities is part of a larger system of violence and racism against all communities of color, including Black, Brown, and Indigenous communities.
In this time of crisis, let’s come together and build just communities, where we are all safe, where all workers are treated with dignity and respect, and where all our loved ones thrive.
In Solidarity,
Asian Americans Advancing Justice-Atlanta & Georgia NAACP
Healing Resources for AAPI (Asian American and Pacific Islander) Communities and Sex Workers
Last updated: March 21, 2021
Compiled by the Institute for the Development of Human Arts
AAPI-led Virtual Healing Opportunities
Resources
Asian American mental health and healing:
Healing racialized trauma:
Anti-racism in clinical practice
Anti-Asian violence and transformative justice:
Mutual aid:
Service Provider and Organization Directories
Articles
Organizations to Support
Accounts to Follow
This list is being updated on an ongoing basis. Please email us at contact@idha-nyc.org if you have recommended resources for us to add.
Please join the Autistic Women & Nonbinary Network for a panel of five disabled advocates discussing undergrad and graduate students’ access to mental health support.
Self-Advocacy for Survival: Disability Rights & Mental Health in Higher Ed
Thursday, 17 December 2020, at 7:00 PM Eastern / 4:00 PM Pacific
RSVP (registration is free)
We will provide ASL interpretation (with a CDI), CART captioning, and video and audio-only connection options.
Students with cognitive, developmental, neurological, and learning disabilities experience higher rates of mental health disabilities, including depression, anxiety, and post-traumatic stress disorder. Yet most universities do not provide meaningful, affordable, or long-term mental health services. As a result, undergraduate and graduate students often must advocate for campus-wide access and parity. In this panel, current and recent students with disabilities will discuss their work to engage campus partners and advocate for improvements.
Panelists
Moderator:
Welcoming remarks:
Please note that after registering on EventBrite, you will also receive instructions for receiving a Zoom link. AWN will host this event on Zoom as well as livestream to Facebook.
SDS-Discuss mailing list
SDS-Discuss@lists.disstudies.org
http://lists.disstudies.org/mailman/listinfo/sds-discuss_lists.disstudies.org
November 29, 2020
TL;DR: feedback form, event recordings, art exhibit, strengths for wellbeing, graduate mental health survey, mental health month masks, imposter syndrome survey
If you haven’t already, join the GSG Slack, an open forum with over 1200 graduate students. Also, follow us on Twitter!
What a November! Thank you enormously for any involvement you had in the Princeton Graduate Student Government’s 2020 Mental Health Awareness Month.
Whether you attended some of the virtual events, visited our online art exhibit, interacted with anecdotes from Princeton students on the GSG Slack and Facebook pages, participated in any of our daily wellness challenges, or are just responding to this survey, we hope you’ll make a bit more space for mental well-being for yourself and for those around you.
Although Mental Health Awareness Month is coming to a close, we hope you’ll continue to make your mental wellness a priority. We hope to see you at future mental health events throughout the year, and at next year’s Mental Health Awareness Month in November 2021!
Here is our compiled list of Mental Health Resources both on and off Princeton campus. Attached to this email, you’ll also find information on virtual drop-in hours with TigerWell outreach counselor, Sue Kim, as well as the telehealth flier from the Center for Emotional Health, an off-campus center offering teletherapy as part of the Student Health Plan exclusive provider network for mental and behavioral health. Teletherapy appointments continue to be covered by SHP at 100% (no co-pay) through January 31, 2021.
For more information about Mental Health Month, you can explore this sit. You can also contact us with any questions at graduatementalhealth@gmail.com.
I. Feedback Form
Please let us know how you felt about the schedule of events over this past month, and if you have any suggestions for future improvement. We appreciate any feedback you have! You can access the google form to submit an anonymous response here.
II. Event Recordings
In case you missed some of the Mental Health Month events, you can watch a few of the recordings on our website. Below is a list of events that were recorded:
III. Art Exhibit
Our virtual art exhibition, Unique Minds: Creative Voices, will remain online through December. We invite you to visit the beautiful 3D virtual gallery here. You can read more about the exhibit on our website here.
IV. Strengths for Wellbeing | Friday, December 4th at 11am EST
Want to avoid burn-out? Join strengths coach, Lauren Scarlett for a session on how to discover your individual strengths to build self-awareness, resilience, and wellbeing. You will complete the Cappfinity Strengths Assessment and receive a free Strengths Profile Report. There will be an interactive group discussion on Friday, December 4th 11am-12:15pm. GradFUTURES is sponsoring this event as part of Mental Health Awareness Month. Register here.
V. Graduate Mental Health Survey
Check your email for a message about a 15-minute survey on Graduate Student Mental Health (subject: Longitudinal Research on Graduate Student Stressors). This is part of a project run by Princeton graduate students through the Graduate Mental Health Initiative. The goal of the survey is to better understand graduate student mental health at Princeton, especially in response to new coronavirus stressors, in order to design better targeted mental health interventions.
VI. Mental Health Month Masks
Didn’t get your Mental Health Month facemask yet? You can still pick up a mask at the Caldwell Fieldhouse testing clinic. Get your mask the next time you pick-up testing kits! Supply is limited, so we encourage you to pick up your mask as soon as possible before they run out. We ask that you only take one mask per person. (Note that all masks have already been claimed from the residential pick-up locations at the Graduate College, Lakeside and Lawrence apartments).
VII. Imposter Syndrome Survey
The Graduate Peer Coaching Program (McGraw Center for Teaching and Learning) has put together a survey related to imposter syndrome. GPCP is a group of graduate students interested in bringing together other graduate students to talk about issues of belonging, isolation, and imposter syndrome, among other topics. If any of this resonates with you, please fill out the survey here and add your email to participate in future events and workshops.
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GSG’s ongoing mental health resources & quick links:
For more information please email graduatementalhealth@gmail.com. Don’t forget to check out our website and following the Graduate Student Government Facebook Page!
The GSG would like to thank our many campus partners and sponsors including Campus Conversations, the Women*s Center, The Graduate School, Campus Recreation, the LGBT Center, the Carl A. Fields Center, the Office of Religious Life, the Office of Disability Services, the AccessAbility Center, The Center for Career Development, the Davis International Center, The Office of Alumni Affairs, GradFUTURES, Letters to Strangers, the Princeton University Neurodiversity Collective, the McGraw Center for Teaching and Learning, TigerWell, and Counseling and Psychological Services.
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As one of earliest classes of women at Princeton, I learned resilience, mostly on my own. However, I must say, I was mostly happy while there. At the time I was there (1972-1976), I am sure there were mental health support resources available but I do not really remember if they were well advertised. Not sure that it was intentional, but like STDs–if you needed help, you would need to ask. I am sure if you went to McCosh, you could get help then. I am sure resources are better advertised and more readily available now and that students (and I hope faculty and staff) in the Princeton community have greater comfort in asking for help. Lots of good things have happened in time such as better communication (to include social media) and information more readily available (web, etc). My advice: don’t hesitate to ask for help!
TL;DR: week four at a glance, panel on coping with covid anxiety, one-on-one mindfulness training, guided mindfulness meditation, mental health survey results report, manic monologues, mental health month masks, imposter syndrome survey
If you haven’t already, join the GSG Slack, an open forum with over 1200 graduate students. Also, follow us on Twitter!
It’s the 4th and final week of Mental Health Awareness Month! Although we are nearing the end of Mental Health Month, we still have several events coming up this week. Below are some highlights for Week 4 of Mental Health Month. In case you missed some of the previous events, you can watch a few of the recordings.
I. Week Four at a Glance
Here is the Week 4 event line-up. A PDF poster is attached containing clickable registration/Zoom links for every event this week! Please sign up and join us!
II. Panel Discussion on Coping with COVID-19 Anxiety | TOMORROW, Monday, November 23rd at 10am EST
Join us for an interactive panel discussion TOMORROW, Monday, 11/23 at 10am EST on how we are coping with our COVID-19 related anxiety. Register here. The discussion will be moderated by Dr. Laura Murray, McGraw Center for Teaching and Learning.
Panelists:
III. One-on-one Mindfulness Training | Monday, November 23rd at 6pm EST
Interested in learning how to incorporate more mindfulness into your life? Sign up for a 15-minute appointment tomorrow within the 6-7pm EST window on Monday, 11/23. During your 15-minute session, you’ll practice tools to implement into your life to help self-regulate and harmonize during stressful times. Email padelman@princeton.edu to make an appointment.
IV. Guided Mindfulness Meditation with David Campbell | Tuesday, November 24th at 12:15pm EST
Join CPS counselor Dr. David Campbell on Tuesday, 11/24 at 12:15pm EST for a guided mindfulness meditation session for stress reduction. Join via Zoom here: https://princeton.zoom.us/j/99176942418
V. Graduate Mental Health Survey – 2019 Results Report | Tuesday, November 24th at 3pm EST
Check your email for a message about a 15-minute survey on Graduate Student Mental Health (subject: Longitudinal Research on Graduate Student Stressors). This is part of a project run by Princeton graduate students through the Graduate Mental Health Initiative. The goal of the survey is to better understand graduate student mental health at Princeton, especially in response to new coronavirus stressors, in order to design better targeted mental health interventions. Join us for a presentation on last year’s survey results by Abby Novick Hoskin, Department of Pyschology, on Tuesday, 11/24 at 3pm: https://princeton.zoom.us/j/3756770759
VI. The Manic Monologues | Call for Personal Short Stories by Tuesday, November 24th
McCarter Theatre’s The Manic Monologues, a virtual theater project directed by theater lecturer Elena Araoz, is designed to ignite conversation and disrupt stigma around mental illness. The project seeks confidential personal short-story submissions from Princeton undergrads and grad students about their experience with mental health struggles. Submit anonymously online by November 24, 2020. at 11:59pm EST.
VII. Mental Health Month Facemasks
Didn’t get your Mental Health Month facemask yet? You can still pick up a mask at the Caldwell Fieldhouse testing clinic. Get your mask the next time you pick-up testing kits! Supply is limited, so we encourage you to pick up your mask as soon as possible before they run out. We ask that you only take one mask per person. (Note that all masks have already been claimed from the residential pick-up locations at the Graduate College, Lakeside and Lawrence apartments).
VIII. Imposter Syndrome Survey
The Graduate Peer Coaching Program (McGraw Center for Teaching and Learning) has put together a survey related to imposter syndrome. GPCP is a group of graduate students interested in bringing together other graduate students to talk about issues of belonging, isolation, and imposter syndrome, among other topics. If any of this resonates with you, please fill out the survey here and add your email to participate in future events and workshops.
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GSG’s Mental Health Month ongoing resources:
Stay tuned for daily posts on the #health-resources channel of our Slack page, including daily Wellness Challenges as part of our ongoing Mental Health Month Wellness Bingo game. You can download the Bingo Board from this email. We challenge you to see if you can get Bingo by the end of the month!
We have also been posting mental health anecdotes submitted anonymously by graduate students addressing their mental health in graduate school. These stories are shared on the #health-resources channel of our Slack page, our website, and the Graduate Student Government Facebook Page to open up the conversation around shared experiences as graduate students at Princeton. We invite you to take a look at statements from other grad students on their experiences. You are not alone!
For more information please email graduatementalhealth@gmail.com. Don’t forget to stay up to date on Mental Health Month by checking out our website and following the Graduate Student Government Facebook Page!
The GSG would like to thank our many campus partners and sponsors including Campus Conversations, the Women*s Center, The Graduate School, Campus Recreation, the LGBT Center, the Carl A. Fields Center, the Office of Religious Life, the Office of Disability Services, the AccessAbility Center, The Center for Career Development, the Davis International Center, The Office of Alumni Affairs, GradFUTURES, Letters to Strangers, the Princeton University Neurodiversity Collective, the McGraw Center for Teaching and Learning, TigerWell, and Counseling and Psychological Services.
”I have OCD, and my long standing symptoms have been strongly exacerbated by the pandemic. It’s more difficult now than ever to break out of patterns of obsessive, anxious thoughts. I’ve never really liked leaving my apartment even before the pandemic, but now it’s even harder to get myself to leave the safety of my home. I have regular nightmares about being outside when a crowd magically materializes and it is impossible to stay 6 feet apart from others. I’m worried that once the pandemic is over, it will be difficult for me to ‘re-emerge’ into society, as I’ve fallen back into my hermit-like comfort zone. I’m challenging myself to undertake exposures every day. Teletherapy has helped–my therapist will stay on the phone with me while I go outside to do an exposure like take out the trash. I know I’ll get through this, but it takes a lot of time, effort and self-compassion.”
“The pandemic has resulted in significant changes to my body. As an unabashed femme, I find a lot of joy in things like fashion, makeup, and looking my best. While this may sound shallow, I would argue that traditionally feminine interests are often dismissed as trivial by society, but they are valid forms of expression and can be a positive aspect of identity. However, my ability to enjoy these interests has taken a hit during the pandemic. I gained 20 pounds in the past several months, and now a lot of my clothes don’t fit anymore. Unfortunately, this has negatively impacted my self image. I am trying to incorporate body positivity into my thinking. After all, my body is healthy and has kept me alive through a global pandemic! But I feel cut off from an aspect of my identity that has previously served as a source of joy in the midst of an often stressful graduate school experience. I don’t feel my best and I want to regain my previous level of physical fitness. I am working on starting a new healthy routine involving daily moderate exercise and regular balanced meals. I am also making a point to wear makeup and dress well for Zoom meetings, just to feel a bit more ‘put together’ and provide some sense of normalcy so that I can feel more like myself in these strange times.”